How to Pick Up Ladies
by FieryFafar
Summary: here are tips from pokeboys on how to flirt


_1. Green_

"First, you gotta be cool and smooth." Green winked seductively. He then saw Leaf walking by, merely widening the smile he wore. With three long strides, he approached the girl and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "Hey Leaf," he said softly, face close to hers. "Wanna go out-"

"No." Leaf answered shortly and coldly.

In less than a second, Green was sulking and crying in the corner at the cruel rejection.

_2. Jun_

"Okay first, you need to softly hold her face with your hands," Jun explained as he cupped Hikari's cheeks, who just so happened to be confused as to why she was so close to Jun.

"Then, with a long breath taken," Jun inhaled sharply, "you SCREAM YOUR UNDYING LOVE FOR THEM!"

"_JUN!_"

_3. Ruby_

"You get a handkerchief, hold her hands with the handkerchief," Ruby held Sapphire's hands, who seemed surprised at his actions. "And then, with a loving tone…" He slowly closed the distance between their faces, earning a good shade of blush on her cheeks.

"…you tell her to go get a bath."

Next thing Ruby knew, he was being chased by a madwoman.

_4. Cheren_

"You read a book and train your Pokémon until she notices you."

"I'll never notice you if you keep doing that, though." White commented plainly at his boring strategy. She yawned while Cheren jumped in shock and felt insulted at her blatant comment. Fists clenching by his sides, he swiftly spun his heel and glared at her.

"Nobody asked y- Wait." Realization hit him right on the face. "D-did you just speak in the first person?" His face was red as ten thousand suns when all Cheren obtained was a lazy, yet adorable smile from White.

_5. Gold_

"You wink and smirk at them." Gold explained with a cocky tone. Right in the nick of time, his eyes met Silver's. With a wide grin splashing his face, the dark-haired teen gave Silver a naughty wink.

Silver didn't say a word. Instead, he stood up and calmly walked toward Gold. To know that the redhead was approaching him, Gold suddenly felt his heart racing inside his chest. "Silver?" Gold mumbled faintly as he stopped in front of him. The boy looked at Silver, an eyebrow raised in confusion.

No words left Silver's mouth. With his face giving not a single hint of expression, he tugged the goggles on Gold's head, pulled it down, stopped right in front of Gold's eyes…

…And released them with a sharp snap.

"OW _DUDE!_" Gold yelled in pain and fell to the ground.

_6. Hyu_

"You plot your revenge and swear to the blood of your ancestors that you will catch them no matter what, even in your deathbed." Hyu growled in sheer determination.

"Um…Hyu…" Mei lightly tapped his shoulder, a concerned frown forming her lips. "You're here to give tips on how to pick up ladies. Not…planning a life-consuming revenge on Team Plasma…"

His head snapped to look at her. "Wait this isn't the place to give tips on how to stop Plasma?"

_7. Silver_

"You leave them before they leave you." Silver wept in the corner as memories of his father abandoning him rolled in his mind.

_8. Red_

"You hide yourself in the snow and soon someone will find you." Red gave a thumbs-up as he stood inside the hole made out of pure white snow. His Pokémon clapped and cheered for him, obviously, agreeing with his 'creative' idea.

Green only stood a few feet away from him, disappointed and sad that his best friend would be single forever.

_9. N_

"You read a beautiful literature poem that shows the exact beauty of these female creatures. Like this one!" N laughed happily as he held a piece of paper. One fist close to his mouth, he coughed lightly and stood in front of a blushing White.

With a wide, boyish smile, N started his recite with a sweet, calm tone. "He came to town like a midwinter storm. He rode through the fields, so handsome and strong." White closed his eyes, enjoying the poem he found on the internet. "His eyes was his tools and his smile was his gun. But all he had come for was having some fun."

_Wait a minute…_ White's mind halted like gears. Quickly her eyes were locked at N, who was still entranced by the poem. _That's not a poem. That's-!_

"If it hadn't been for Cotton-Eye Joe, I'd been married long time ago." N spoke with such confidence and drama, one fist even raised in the air. "Where did you come from, where did you go?" He looked left and right as if he was searching for the meaning of life. "Where did you come from, Cotton-Eye Joe?"

White felt like a big boulder had slammed her face. She froze in place, completely unmoving. Her jaw dropped to a point where Geodudes could enter and make it their new home. When N finally finished reciting his 'poem', the boy flashed cheerful smile. "So, White, did you enjoy it? I have to say, I am curious about the whereabouts of this Joe who possesses the cotton eye."

She didn't say a word. But she did exhale a loud groan of despair. "Why…"

_**END.**_

_**0.0.0**_

**now back with more stupid**


End file.
